Testimonies

Hello! My name is Nicole and I guess it would only be appropriate for me to start this conversation I was one of us lucky ones who was raised in the Christian church since infancy. My family ensured that I was given a proper baptism at birth, took me to church faithfully each Sunday, attended weekly small group bible studies and Sunday school classes, went through confirmation class, and attended Christian-sponsored events and volunteer opportunities all throughout my childhood and young adult life. It is safe to say that I was raised in a quintessentially American "Christian" household, where manners, pleasantries and Christian-based programming was both encouraged and required. AND I LOVED IT! I was most definitely proud of my faith and loved everything Jesus. My relationship with Him as my savior became official when I was in the 8th grade and knelt down in front of my childhood bed and cried out to Him to please save me and make me the woman He wanted me to become. I remember, specifically praying that He "never allow me to leave Him or His Faith, regardless of what I am surrounded by, influenced by, or forced to become adapted to as an adult." Boy! Was that ever His gracious way of protecting me, even way back then! Ironically, little did I know that these same words would come back to remind me of His INCREDIBLE GRACE and FORGIVENESS years later (like 20 to be exact!) To make a very long story very short, as innocent and precious as my naive heart was at that time, the temptations of life would eventually almost get the best of me. I truly believe to this very day that, that one simple prayer may have been what saved me from what was to come in my future. By this, I mean that my post-teenage years would become far less innocent and more turbulent in my faith! Not that I was a "bad kid" by any means. I truly wasn't a bad person. I simply became infatuated with the world and all the temptations that came with it. I became entralled with a certain "lifestyle" that I deemed to be "successful" as the world often defines it and wanted to experience it more and more. Like any naive, young girl coming from a somewhat "sheltered" and innocent background, I thought that the more I experienced in life the better and more successful I would become. This of course, included being included in what the world deems as the "exclusive" crowd who would be invited to "exclusive" events, being able to obtain the "nicer things in life," blah blah blah. You get the idea! Again, being extremely naive, I didn't realize that there is often some sort of cost that comes with this sort of "lifestyle," which often most certainly includes loosening your Christian morals and values, as unfortunately, our world doesn't seem to appreciate nor honor very much most times. (Or at least this is what the media portrays!) Due to my naivety, opportunities presented to me, and a bit of selfishness I pursued this lifestyle to the fullest, allowing my Christian values to backslide all along the way. I started drinking heavily, making EXTREMELY poor decisions, swearing more frequently, dating men that I should have never dated (morality-wise,) and yes, deep down, I definitely knew better!, and even considered joining a lot of my friends and associates in doing illegal drugs. (Because is these circles, this was not only encouraged but was actually considered to be a sign of "success" if you could afford this sort of "activity".) Thankfully, and by God's grace... I never did get into drugs. (I won't deny that I experimented out of curiosity and a desire to fit in,) but God kept his faithful hand on me and never allowed me to actually "like" it, which I truly believe was part of that promise He kept to me in that prayer from long ago. I ended up dating all sorts of the wrong types of men and hanging with some very not-so-Christian people, not saying they are bad people. Some of them were very nice people, but they chose to do things that I know I should not have been associating myself with. This perceived exclusive lifestyle eventually eroded at my Christian faith, as I began to believe the lie that my Christian friends were "boring" and didn't understand my need to be a part of a more exciting life than getting together each week for small group studies or playing board games at each other's apartments on the weekends. I started to take for granted all of God's many years of grace, where I was given SO MANY blessings that many people never had the chance to have. I failed to see all that God had brought me through, like overcoming my social anxiety as a younger child and even dangers that I was unaware of that I had escaped from. I was so enchanted by what I thought were blessings of being a part of the "world" that I forgot about my first true love, (Jesus,) and instead chased the love of pleasure and opportunity and lustful relationships. Although, I never became as jaded as some of my peers do, I did become jaded and didn't even realize it. It took me falling right on my face that finally "woke me up," so to speak, and realize what I was doing wrong with my life and how far I came from those more innocent and happy days of when I appreciated the simpler things in life. This fall was, of course, beyond humiliating, and literally almost killed me. It took everything in my power to overcome this, which of course, I could have never done without Jesus and my faithful friends and family who know and love me. It is only recently, that I have finally been able to overcome many of the evil effects that the devil had planned to destroy me from this... and for that I am beyond and forever grateful. The most important fact that came from this was that throughout that time, Jesus remained true to me, and gently reminded me of things that happened as a result of certain decisions I had made in the past. Decisions that He reminded me that I knew weren't the right thing to do but I chose to do in order to "save face" or not look like a religious heretic, as some circles might describe. He also reminded me of times where He warned me that this very thing could happen through other people! There were specific memories... that Jesus showed me that happened to me in church or from people I had met in church that ended up really helping me get through my specific situation which I knew there was no way I would have been able to get through had I not been forewarned about from those many years ago. This not only strengthened my faith, but it also showed me that I can never mess with Jesus again! LOL. He is very real and is the best friend you could ever ask for. It was through some of these struggles that I also was inspired to start this website. I knew that even in my mess, Jesus would help me craft the right message so that I could help others overcome what He helped me to overcome. I will forever try my best to represent Jesus in the way He wants me to and am a proud servant of Him and all He represents. If you ever need prayer or simply want to talk about your testimony or mine, please feel free to contact me at my email: support@christianinspo.com. Thank you for reading and may God bless you and keep you in His care.